Thursday, August 25, 2005

Texas Heat

Hmmmmm, I am far too braindead to be funny today. It is hot outside. Like, really ridiculously hot. Like "I'm hiking up the giant, mountainous, sweaty balls of Paul Bunyan" hot. Ew, I sort of made myself wretch there. No, not really. Bunyan's balls are bun-yummy.
See! I did make a funny. Ok, so I know people (my friends) are reading this, but are not posting comments. What's that about? Post some shit weirdos. I'm self-involved, but need some more catalysts in order for my self-absorption to really shine.
Dave Woody sent me some awesome comics yesterday: early zippy the pinhead, flaming carrot thingy, and some by Adrian Tomine. Woody is goody. He may even be greaty.
Also, my mother, who may actually be the only person reading mah blog, wants me to rescind an earlier proclammation that she was "butch." In reality, she braided my locks until they looked like spun gold, made fondue every night, and NEVER, NEVER challenged me to a fight. Happy mom? Please don't pummel me to death with your genteel waifish fingers. They were made only for skinny cigarette holders and removing coral lipstick stains.
Pictured above is a Texas teen who was upset to learn that his school's cross-dressing day had been OUTLAWED. Oh, for shame! Some backward-ass gap-toothed illiterate apparently thought is was unhealthy for boys to dress like girls. He is awesome though isn't he? I think we all feel like that dude sometimes.


B said...

A little blogging encouragement...Ali, I love your blog. I read it just about everyday at work while sipping on mediocre coffee. I especially like it when you write poems about Alaina.

B said...

be careful...I wouldn't want to see you end up like the notorious Washingtonienne blogger, Jessica Cutler. I read her trashy book at the beach the other week. damn.

Ali Fitzgerald said...

B! Thanks for reading my rants. I miss yo' ass. I lost your new celly number, will you send it to me again? Who is Jessica Cutler? Does she write like Fabio-esque romance novel blogs? Intriguing....