Sunday, January 07, 2007

New Year's Rezzzzzzzolutions:

Stop smoking. I swear that I will accomplish this even if it takes dumpster loads of codeine and nicotine lollipops to calm me down.

Stop caring so deeply what people think (yes, underneath my thick-leather-stitched-silence-of-the-lambs-people-suit-veneer I really do care).

Exercise, exercise, JAZZERCISE!

Actually take the time to respond to people on email/the phone. I am ever so bad at this, and I just now realized that it hurts peoples' feelings. I am sorry index finger is unruly and defiant. It barely picks my nose anymore.

Wear more suspenders. Annie Hall and Bette Porter look hot in them, so why shouldn't I?

Write many more graphic novellish bookies. I am already working on one called, "All the People I've Ever Made Out With." It is very Tracy Emin. I must say, you'd be surprised at both the number and breadth of the people I've locked lips with. Quite the teaser eh?

Stop complaining about the tedium of applying to teaching jobs/residencies/bullshit. I just need to do it, like a good girl should.

Go to every art opening I can. I have been somewhat lazidelic lately.

Stop making up stupid words. See above.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, I am banning my evil mistress (cable) from my life. Hello, Joyce, goodbye "Punk'd."

Stop talking so morbidly about serial killers and things of that nature. Sometimes I forget that the macabre can be frightening to people. Especially the little girl scouts that I lure into my Aileen Wuornos murder shrine.

Start cleaning up my fucking house/studio/car/life. It looks like the inside of a dog.

Be an excellent, caring TA for the little people.

Build a statue of my character "Marina Walker the 18-Wheeler," out of papier mache and love.

Eat healthy non-frozen items. I am also banning my second mistress: frozen dumplings.

Relive my Spain days when I stayed out until 6 and tongued everyone (see book on people I've made out with---there are many chapters devoted to this particular time in my life---oh Ignacio!).

Live life to the fullest every day!

Less sarcasm. See above.


Alainicus said...

So first of all, I'm loving the inside of a dog reference. Very graphic, yet delicious. And secondly, IGNACIO was mine. In that he-doesn't-like-me-at-all kind of way. Pete Sampras ring a bell?

Ali Fitzgerald said...

I almost put "less attractive Spanish version of Pete Sampras," but then I realized that Ignacio sounded better. P.S. Don't you ever wonder what happened after you got out of the cab?