MFA Thesis Show tonight! Everybody bring their party hat and wave it around like you just don't care! Like you don't care about your outrageous collegiate debt! Or your fictitious degree that earned you nothing but an angsty scowl, a self-serving need for therapy, specified job skills that make you unfit for most anything (including life) and finally, crabs from those dirty (albeit tempting) undergrads. Wave that hat boy, wave that motherfucking hat.
*I do not have crabs.