Monday, May 07, 2007

Finished thesis.
Finished grad school.
Finished book about Tarzan-like prostylitizer and his amphibian whore.
Finished the "Don Juan" in one day (the "Don Juan" is a taco that resembles a giant head in both deliciousness and girth).
Finished caring about my love handles, impending aneurysm and overall health (one cannot worry when one doesn't have health insurance).
Finished receiving rejection letters from a plethora of institutions *see defeatist post below. Whitney Museum: I'm totally going to jump you in some dark alley, you dickie-wearing nerd haven.
Finished pretending to wear pants, it's time for my creative terry-cloth robe ensembles!
Finished complaining about possible jobs, have applied to a local prison as s coy yet flirtatious songbird slash warden. *See Queen Latifah in "Chicago" for more info about my potential position.
Finished writing sentences that begin with finished. Too much, Ali, tis' too much.

Sidenote: Meeting with the people from the Contemporary Arts Museum in Houston today. I have a feeling there will be a lot of misplaced laughter (on my part) and maybe some inappropriate references to sex (on their part, of course). It's always a crap-shoot with me and studio visits, sometimes I get paralyzing performance anxiety (see stilted speech by Barbara Bush to loved ones of deceased veterans ), while at other times I am (immodest though this may sound) completely irreverent and charming. To paraphrase (with some awesome wordplay!) sometimes I am "Dr. Jekyll" and sometimes I am "Mr. Hide In My Studio and Cry."

Wish me luck adoring and apathetic public!


Alainicus said...

Good luck. I threw my phone in a sink full of water this weekend. I can't even call you to cry about it.

ezimmerman said...

Congratulations! Have a beer, have a whiskey, have two more of each…after the studio visit that is.

damn it said...

Finished watching Good Times that show is dynamite.
Luck, congrats, and chin up.

d. said...

In the allegorical vision that casts the world and its inhabitants as a ship of fools, those recently degreed with MFAs are calling out to them from the Raft of Medusa. These people are not intent on being rescued, they want acceptance in the art world and they're willing to fuck their way into an entry level position. You, you're smart and pretty. That and a tight pussy will take you far—farther than Houston I hope.

Ali Fitzgerald said...

Ezimmerman-in defiance of your orders, I actually had a beer before the meeting but I don't think they found my droopy jowls and Milwaukee's Best scent that appealing.

Such a mouth d.!
Tight anuses work too by the way.

Ali Fitzgerald said...

P.S. I love Good Times.