Part of my intensive *scoff* English teacher training today involved learning Hungarian for an hour. It was supposed to teach us how to instruct beginners using only the target language. I wouldn't even be telling you this except the teacher (who is Hungarian) said I had the best Hungarian accent she'd ever heard. This proves my previous assertion that I am indeed only good at things that are useless, obscure or communist. Or all three, like grown up Bobby Fisher.
I start teaching on Wednesday (my first lesson involves banking terminology *shudder*), then on Monday I go teach employees of a solar-energy company in the small border town of Frankfurt Oder, which is literally just over the bridge from Poland.
I am going to go over that bridge and eat meatballs and figure out what Poland's national identity is comprised of...because I really have no idea.
Is Polanski Polish? Are all the citizens angry and lumberjacky? Do they still have consumption there? Is the polka Polish? What the fuck is Poland?
The other interesting thing is that Frankfurt Oder is known in part for it's large Neo-Nazi population. Woot-woot! I'm totallies gonna wear my knee high shiny black boots on Monday---just to be sure and impress all the cute boyz.
"Ooh, Henrich's hair is getting kinda' leftist, what with it's extra millimeter in the back, next thing you know he'll be watching Weeds. This isn't Frankfurt Am Main, Henrich! Let's shank him with my esoteric Hitler-bobblehead lance."
Reading public: If you don't hear from me, it's because I did something really liberalese and am probably being held hostage in some skinhead's sex dungeon. Please send Sarah Palin in with her crazy mooseguns and Hockey mom diplomatic powers.
*Please do not send in Sarah Palin, she would probably just stay up playing World of Warcraft with them.